I love weddings. As a man who likes his romances distinctly secular, I try to avoid churches whenever I can. But when it comes to matrimony, I don’t mind the ‘holy’ in the least. This weekend was my cousin’s wedding, and of all my cousin’s (there are a lot of them) he was probably the one I was closest to. He was the one who I would play video games with, run around pretending that we were Power Rangers, and all that good stuff. We lost touch during the college years, but once we both moved back into the city, we met up a few times to catch up. Sharing some of your earliest memories with someone entitles you to a certain sort of bond, and seeing him always brings back laughs.
Fast forward to a Saturday in July, when he’s standing up at the altar and his fiance is walking down the aisle. Not to make this all about me buddy, but you really screwed me by jumping the line and getting married. Now all that pressure is on me, you son of a bitch. Anyways, the ceremony was beautiful, and no matter what, I still get a little misty-eyed when they say their vows, and I always cheer my head off, perhaps inappropriately so. I love weddings, you get everyone you love together in one big room, and you eat and you dance. You smile, you hear music, and you just be happy in one giant affirmation of love in all forms.
The Sunday after his wedding I helped my friend settle into her new place, and I ended up cooking dinner for her and another friend. We scrounged up whatever plates we could find, and managed to find enough utensils for the three of us in all her boxes. Of course, none of the furniture was there yet, so there we no chairs, and definitely no dinner table. We ended up sitting on the floor eating our food and watching old episodes of ‘The Bachelor’. All I have to say is, for some guy who literally has 30 beautiful women vying for him, he sure whines a lot about his life. What an ass.
If you think about it, in terms of extravagance, the two nights were pretty much on the opposite ends of the scale. But I think it’s these rituals that come every so often that make us feel connected with one another. We know who our friends are, we know who our families are, and it feels disingenuous and yet overbearing to tell them that we care for them all the time. These events, big or small, remind us that the day-to-day grind is there for a reason. Whatever cost that grind exacts us, it is made back tenfold by being in the presence of those that we love, and to share in that warmth. It may be few and far in between, but these moments reinforce what we know to be true. I think we all know who we love, and most days we don’t get to tell them how we feel. I think that’s why I love weddings, I love irreverent and impromptu dinner parties, and most of all, I love when you can say “I love you” by just being together.