Her smiles, her frowns
Her ups,her downs
Are second nature to me now
Like breathing out, breathing in
I was serenely independent and content before we met
Surely I could always be that way again
I’ve grown accustomed to her looks
Accustomed to her voice
Accustomed to her face
During the climactic ending of ‘My Fair Lady’ this is what Professor Higgins says with regret, even though he is an acerbic, arrogant, yet brilliant cad (who bears absolutely zero resemblance in personality to me). It’s obvious he’s wounded, but he tries to play it off like it’s no big deal, openly wishing for Eliza to fail and come crawling back (pretty dick-ish) but in the end, he just realizes that he misses her. It’s really an odd thing when you first start to realize that you miss someone. I’ve never missed any guys. It’s not that I don’t have close guy friends, it’s just that things always tend to pick exactly where they left off the next time we see each other. Then there are always the people that you should miss and do miss, like your family, but what I’m talking about is something different. It’s the type of missing someone that sneaks up on you.
You sometimes forget how much you see someone during a day or a week, and how much you joke around with them, talk with them and simply just be with them. I try to anesthetize myself to these sorts of these because right now I can’t afford to be sidetracked. You don’t feel it at first, but it’s one of those little nagging things that you can’t place. You don’t know what’s off, but you know that there’s something amiss. That’s what I mean that it sneaks up on you. But it still knocks you on your ass when you realize that you take for granted someone that’s actually carved out a little niche in your life. When they’re not there you miss the dozens of tiny ways that having them in your life made it just a bit better. A smile, a laugh, a look, a text, that’s what you miss, or at least what I miss. I know that I’m a believer in the grand romance, but god forbid, this might be a sign of my budding maturity.
What does this mean? Hell, I have no clue and I don’t know if I have the time to sort that out right now, but, all I know is the I’ve grown accustomed to her face.