You’re really cute. Normally, I don’t mind that I live on the 4th floor, but every time I see you getting in the same elevator as me, I really start to care. The elevators in our building are way too efficient. It gets me to my floor incredibly quickly and never with pause. That gives me around 3 seconds to come up with something witty/charming/winning to say to you, 2 seconds to double check it, and then another 3 seconds say it. 8 seconds. That’s not a lot of time. There was only one other instance when I had more time than that. That was when we were stuck in the lobby for a bit and another guy was in the elevator hitting on you. I remember catching your gaze, thinking, ‘what the hell is this guy doing’, getting the same gaze back, and then me laughing, and subsequently trying to turn it into a loud cough as the guy glared at me. As we rode the elevator to the fourth floor in awkward silence, I couldn’t wipe the smirk off my face. After the requisite 8 second ride, I said the same thing that I always say to you as I get to my floor.
“Have a good night.”
Which, for the time being, will have to do.